New From Hypocrisy:

US Bioweapons Research, sort of gives you one of those "Sure, they're just doing it for research" moments. Honestly I wouldn't mind if the government were doing research on weapons that turned puppies, kittens and baby into a foul paste as long as they were honest enough to say, "Yes, we have baby killing bioweapons and if anyone ever decides to REALLY fuck with us don't think we won't paste their pets and children. We are some badass motherfuckers." I realize politics being what they are we can't do things like this, but I really hate that we have this continuing habit of bald-faced lying going on. The politicians do it, the officials do it, the contractors that work for the government are obligated to do it. If we've developed a spray that makes people's nuts fall off why won't we tell the world? We were bold enough to give it the go-ahead, we should be courageous enough to face up to the consequences. Politics isn't about facing up to consequences though I suppose, it's about doing what you want and holding power over people and then making scapegoats out of them. Oh well, the world sucks. Anything new?

You Know What Is Really Nice?

Phone calls from old friends out of the blue are awesome. I should do that more myself, except I've got so many non-traditional hours going on in my life that most of my old friends would probably shoot me if they got a call from me at 3 am when I'd most love to chat (because who is around to chat with at 3am besides foreigners otherwise) and I've lost track of so many more old friends that I feel ashamed. Where do these people go anyways? So, if you stumble onto here and you used to know me - give me shout back or something. Even to tell me I'm a complete raging asshole, because that's something I need to hear about and I'd still love to hear from you.

Morality Test Results

Check out my Morality! 64% liberal, 36% conservative

I don't have a clue what that is supposed to be about though. I just wanted to check and see if I was going to stab anyone soon.

Childhood Ends

You're not the same little girl I held in my arms so long ago
You've grown a past and lost that innocence that made me safe and warm
The softest of your kisses are no more meant for me
And baby, I can't protect you anymore from who you want to be

In your tears from when he'd hurt you, I used to kiss them away
And when you whispered to me your demons I told you I would summon myself to stay
You're not the fragile reed of glass that threatens to shatter in the wind
And baby I can't protect you anymore, childhood always ends

I've watched you growing and tried to pretend that it was a lie
But like any baby bird I know you'll grab your wings and fly
I don't know what sun will rise in my horizon once you're gone
But baby I can't protect you, anymore than you could call my heart your home

No Excuses

Cybersex never got any funnier than this, go ahead. You know you want to check it out. It's ok. After all, I suppose it's more polite to read about people having cybersex than it is to watch your neighbors through the curtains, and certainly more polite than taking pictures of yourself having sex with your partner and publishing them on the internet. Theorists probably have a ball with shit like this, but personally I just like to mind my own business. Oh yeah, and shave pubic hair* and take pointless tests on my 80s music knowledge (might be a repeat, who has time to look back and check?)

*No, not really. I just wanted to put that link into the blog some way. Cheap isn't it?

And now? A dirty joke

A man and a woman are sitting side by side at a bar getting really wasted. They are both really depressed. The man asks the woman why she's so down and she replies, "My husband left me because he said I was too kinky in bed." "What a coincidence!" he said, "My wife just left me. She said I was too kinky in bed too." So they start talking and they find that they have much in common so they decide to go to the woman's apartment and have kinky sex. When they arrive at her apartment, she tells him she needs a few minutes so she can slip into something more comfortable. She comes out of the bathroom with a tight, black leather outfit with a whip, handcuffs, a strap-on cock, and a 12 inch studded dildo. Then she hurries into the kitchen and comes out with tabasco sauce, whipped cream, and a rolling pin. Then she notices that the man is putting on his coat and is walking towards the door. "What's going on?", she asks. "I thought you wanted to get kinky?" He turns around and says, "I just fucked your dog and shit in your purse. I'm all done."

Let's Talk About Keanu Reeves (And anything else that I think of)

Ok, so the hum about the new Matrix movie is obviously beginning to go into full swing and that means that Keanu Reeves is appearing once more in my peripheral vision as I sit here engrossed with my computer. That's not a figure of speech, my television really is just a comfortable head nod to the right of my monitor so that I can have pretty pictures to look at while I whip my slow computer into doing some daunting task like opening programs and saving text files. But I digress, the point is that Keanu Reeves is really pale. Not just cracker pale like me, who probably gets about as much sun as your average earthworm or burrowing larvae, but really really pale. The guy looks like he's about to fade away or at least have a gross Ann Rice moment with another similarly pale guy (time to get a suntan I guess). I suppose you could say that it's for the movie, Matrix-esque has always been stylized by vague androgyny and a sort of non-S&M wear gothica. I suppose it was even designed to appeal to those folks like me who liked the Cure and wore too many makeup products in the pursuit of getting laid in the late 80s and early 90s. But I assure you, once Nirvana and the whole grunge thing came along I fled to flannel. I don't have anything against homosexuals, but androgyny gave me the creeps even when it attracted droves of "this will really scare daddy" girls. I understand that now it's not androgynous it's "metrosexual", but it still boils down to dressing yourself up to appeal to parish priests and ancient greeks. Not a good thing in my opinion, but it's possible that I'm just too old and that having the waifish appeal of a sixteen year old boy is good for Keanu's funstick. I can't argue with that, I just wonder what anyone with millions of dollars needs besides the green stuff?

The soundtrack for We Were Soldiers is really outstanding. I admit I haven't seen the movie, but the music is great. From the first track Prelude sang by now deceased singer Johnny Cash to I'll Go With You, it's just perfectly fitting for a bunch of songs about war with the perfect mix of militarism and liberalism. In fact I think I'm going to listen to it some more, instead of write this. Everyone be good ok?

Another sucky post

Amburgers n' Wootbeer is cute. I don't know what it's about, but it's cute.

Adieu is not so cute, but somehow profound. It outlines the journals of an expatriate living in Thailand and really is a sort of fascinatingly sad read. I guess the only sadder to me is that it seems to me that he might have a reason for his feelings of being isolated and alone, living as he is in Thailand away from his language and culture, and I've really just got no excuse. Speaking of Thailand, this is just a random link about what I understand is some edible plant over there. How should I know? I thought it was interesting though, and if it's not interesting to you then at least I can find it interesting that I can lure you all to my boredom.

B3TA is pretty cool, and not just because it's the lurking ground for some incredibly tlented graphic artists and designers. They've got a lot of interesting images to look at, and God knows everyone probably could use a break from my text heavy blog by now right? I mean, I'd love to put some flash in here but that would mean domains and buying flash. Besides, flash would be a good way to freak everyone out and have everyone running away I guess right?

Right now I'm watching community access television from Mobile or something. It's really strange, usually when people get on TV from mobile they're just the standard blue-haired old men talking about how you're going to hell and Jesus saves. These are rock n' roll rednecks though, guys with mullets and and tight black tshirts talking in goofy drawls about awful local rock bands. I appreciated the freaky gory weird community access television from Hawaii more, with it's buckets of homemade fake blood and plotlines that basically involved underage kids walking around in closeup shots wearing mirroshades and posing with their obviously plastic firearms. Great stuff. Anyways, Mobile (check out the website!)sucks. It's a really ugly city. All Alabama cities are pretty ugly though. I don't know what makes a city not ugly and more interesting. Atlanta is pretty ugly sometimes but doesn't feel as trashy as Birmingham for instance, and as pleasant as Montgomery is compared to Miami it still doesn't feel as gorgeous. New Orleans is absolutely filthy and it comes across as mysterious unless you're looking at sending your kids to public schools there. It's just filthy and dangerous at that point I think.

This Person Doesn't Sound White is an interesting article. Prejudice is a weird thing for me. I'm obviously white, from my voice to my cracker ass pasty skin. I can't even claim my real heritage thanks to decades of Nazis, rednecks and Foghorn Leghorn. Being a Southerner IS about being racially profiled, but you can't really claim it unless you want the inevitable backlash of someone wagging a finger at you as some sort of Hitler Youth Wannabe. On the same token I've watched some of my dearest friends suffer from discrimination, seen what a room shutting up because you're the wrong color with my own eyes in Honolulu, and had to constantly chide my own family for falling back on their old habits of racial slurs without even thinking about it. Having to tell your grey-haired grandfather (who honestly doesn't mean a thing by it I think) that nigger isn't a proper word to use is hard when you're growing up. Then you get really racist attitudes like I've seen from some northerners and folks from other countries that don't have the huge amounts of racial mixing that we have around here, with the double whammy of calling ME the racist because (of course) I must be because I was born in Alabama. Oh well, does Phoenix sound white?

Want more tonight? Sure you do! Russian rappers, Peter Pan, the Time Cube, Juvenile Millionaires, Apollo 3 is freakin' old skool, the Weed Webpage, Gaydar, and omigod The Last Samuri looks like a great film. More, crystal clear awesome photgraphy of Heidi's Eyes, Do's and Don'ts, a Voodoo Mancatcher Kit, and this curious page with nothing but women and their pussies. Seriously, they're voting on who is the 'cat lady'. It all looks like one big allergy to me.